Sunday, August 31, 2008

the Great Texas Reverse-Hamburglay Incident of 2008

Ever find yourself in a discussion that you're pretty sure no one has ever had before on this planet?

I found myself engaged in an IM chat exactly like that just today, documented in the IM session below....

[10:47] anonymousDrew: have you ever walked to your car only to find a semi-fresh, twice bitten cheeseburger resting on the hood?

[10:52] crockettdunn: lmfao

[10:52] crockettdunn: no that's crazy

[10:52] crockettdunn: I think that was a hidden camera experiment, probably done to cars all around the nation

[10:52] anonymousDrew: pretty strange.

[10:52] crockettdunn: no American doesn't finish a cheeseburger.

[10:52] anonymousDrew: I said to co-worker..."Uhhh, pickles? onions?"

[10:52] crockettdunn: or that might have been a tainted cheeseburger, my friend

[10:53] anonymousDrew: He didn't think it was very funny.

[10:53] crockettdunn: That's the weirdest funniest fucking thing I've heard all week.

[10:54] crockettdunn: ok, wait.... ARE YOU TELLING me you identified and confronted the culprit, or are you saying you tried to share the humor with a co-witness of the hamburglary?

[10:57] anonymousDrew: think it was stolen? lol, ditching the "hot goods" until things cool down?

[11:04] crockettdunn: purely reverse hamburglary = ham-donor-y.
11:06] *** "anonymousDrew" signed off at Fri Aug 29 11:06:13 2008.
[11:17] *** "anonymousDrew" signed on at Fri Aug 29 11:17:44 2008.

[11:21] crockettdunn: request for your permission 2 use the previous hamburglary discourse in blog

[11:24] anonymousDrew: lol. like i've got copyright ownership on it.

[11:27] anonymousDrew: here i am in the meat capital of the country where doing something like that would be considered a sacrilege.

[11:51] crockettdunn: I'm totally posting

[12:16] anonymousDrew: it's too bad i don't have a picture.

[12:21] crockettdunn: YOU REMOVED IT????

[12:21] crockettdunn: Dude, why'd you remove the reverse hamburglary evidence?

[12:21] anonymousDrew: i never saw the fucker!

[12:22] anonymousDrew: i'm going solely by co-worker's word.

[12:23] crockettdunn: ahhhhh......

[12:23] crockettdunn: so there's no corroborating witness to confirm co-worker didn't eat the evidence?

[12:23] crockettdunn: He totally fucking ate that burger that was rightfully YOURS!!!

[12:25] crockettdunn: I think in TX this means your allowed to shoot to kill

[12:25] anonymousDrew: i don't eat other people's burgers, especially after sitting on a car hood until day's end.

[12:25] crockettdunn: i'm pretty sure I read that in "life's little instruction book." On the other hand, it was probably just about done. Crack an egg on the car hood, wait for it to fry, and do your burger up Fat-Burger LA-style!

Thanks to
anonymousDrew for extricating my brain from Data, Logic, Design, HR, and CashFlow periodically throughout the day.

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