Sunday, June 08, 2008

Your website!, or, "Homer Simpson says, 'Doh! Time to reincorporate....'."

Dear Crockett,

We can tell you care about your online business by the
strength of your site, but you are still losing a good amount of targeted web
traffic. Give us a chance to show where you can stretch your
budget to produce a better online return. Our consultation
is free and at the very least you will gain savvy online marketing insight
specific to your site. Email us today at britanycohen@gmail.com for your
no-charge site review. Include your URL(s) and the best way
to reach you so we can access your online business quickly and get back to you
with targeted information.

Sincerely

Britany Cohen

britanycohen@gmail.com


Zap Marketing

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This promotion is only valid forUSA websites
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Dear Britany-Bot,

You have just violated Blogger's terms and conditions either purposely or inadvertently by spam/guessing blogger post-to-email addresses. Not only that, but your messages also reveal the security credentials of your victims.

This is 3 crimes in one:
1) the equivalent of breaking and entering.... y'know, a hacker. I legally this will be viewed somewhere along the lines of SQL injection.

2) this particular means of breaking and entering falls under the identity theft category.
3) publication / dissemination of private security credentials

This makes your offense, if I had to guess, hmmmmmm….. 6-8 times as serious as that of a spammer. Your “campaign” is the equivalent of a spammer + identity thief + web-defacing hacker.

The only thing that could make your position worse would be if you deleted data, planted PPC ads or found another way to generate DIRECT revenue, or stole credit card numbers.

Google is a virtually a small nation nowadays. I do not envy the position you have put yourself in... I'm imagining they've unleashed the Feds on you already.

My consulting rate is $275/hour, and I estimate it will take me between 2 and 3 hours to change my credentials for all of my blogger sites that you have hit. Please respond with a mailing address to which I can send my invoice.

Cheers!
Crockett Dunn

P.S. it’s not nice to do anything cyber-naughty to Crockett before Crockett has had his morning coffee.

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