THE MOST IMPORTANT AAA BATTERIES EVER!

I opened this package from Plow and Hearth, which seemed to be nothing more than a bunch of catalogs. I thought, "why did they send me these 3 catalogs and all this promo stuff when I just ordered from them very recently?"

Then I found it: I have taken delivery of two extremely urgent AAA batteries.



All the crock-o-pottomi in crock-town are tired (it's late), so I stared for at least 100 seconds, two tiny batteries in my left hand, huge wad of packing materials and catalog in the right. And my mind became sort of stuck in a loop, going back and forth: "do I laugh at this or have I just been very slightly cheated?"

I need Lewis Black or Demetri Martin or someone like that Maddox guy with a real chip on his shoulder to help me make funny with this!

Thoughts come to mind such as the common bank practice of processing checks in order of highest amount to lowest, to maximize overdraft fees. Or banks delaying online bill payments 5 days to hang on to the money longer.

THESE ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT AAA BATTERIES EVER!

g'night.